Day of Not So Much Rest

I would like to say that I am home and yesterday was a day of rest for me but really it was a rather busy day. I had to play catch up with bills and changing of addresses for a million different things and then even thought I could barely stand, I was so tired; I had to clean my fridge and do the dishes because everything pretty much expired this week and garbage comes tomorrow. I also am happy to say that Time Warner came to set up my house phone and Internet so I don't have to wait to go to Grandpas in order to update now. :0) I think I would be lying if I said i was happy to see them though because honestly I was so tired I was falling asleep in the chair while they were outside and that's why I decided to clean instead of sleeping right away. You better believe I napped after though. lol. Otherwise I took it easy. I finally got to talk to Beth and I had to use up the cookie dough in the fridge so I made cookies for my Step mom and the kids over there. They loved them. :0) I also enjoy a very nice long chat with my Step Mom yesterday and I got to hear all about when her mom was in town as well as a little bit more about her growing up. She is also working on a special craft project which is very detailed but very interesting as well. Basically its screen printing but VERY detailed. I was pretty amazed by it.

As for my crafting....I am working on 2 blankets at once but more so on the blanket I am making for Beth to give to her sister. Its for her soon to be here baby boy. :0) I have never used this brand of yarn before so it is taking me a little longer but again I am drawn to the star shaped pattern. I am also doing a star for the other blanket I am working on but I will talk about that blanket more later. Right now I am focusing on finishing this blanket and maybe a little animal to go with it because I will have extra yarn and I have stuffing that needs to be used. I am just trying to decide on which animal I would like to do. Any suggestions from my crochet friends?
Otherwise today I am really feeling pretty crappy so I am resting and about to head to the hospital again for a bit.
I hope you are all well and enjoying the sun.
Keep Smiling.

One More Round - I will beat This!

For those of you who may be new to my blog, you should know that I am a very musical person. I believe that music can often help a person get their feelings out and it even relieves my stress to just sing and let all that pent up energy out. At the moment I really don't have the energy to sing at the top of my lungs but I can say that I have been listening to BarlowGirl all day and singing at the top of my lung from the very bottom of my soul. One song in particular has struck me hard this week because up until now I have felt that I have had one of the strongest support system while being sick however now that it seems like eternity of fighting; I am realizing that a lot of that support system is really not on my side but rather just uses my health to remind themselves each day that someone else has it worse or to gain personal benefits by being my friend. I am honestly in one of the toughest chapters of my life and when I got here this week, I can honestly say that I have never felt so alone. It was if I was checking into a life that I didn't know where it was going to go and if I was going to make it through the day let alone week. Most of the people I normally would talk to in this time are the people who have recently proven that they are here for the wrong reasons and so I have shut down. I have realized that now; in the toughest chapter of my life I need to be around people who are going to not only going to love me but going to support my choice and will to fight this and to support my faith and help me grow. I feel like I have just given up my life to make everyone happy and its never been a better time to just say Forget it all and finally do what is right for me. I do have my families love and support and that means the world to me and I also have some very close friends who I plan on taking on this journey with me but other than those few people, I am planning on leaving many behind and after much prayer; I know this is what I am suppose to be doing. I'm sure I will meet others a long the way but I have put my guard up really high now and I just want people who are going to support me and help me grown without judging. I'm sure I will hit bumps in the roads but I know that God and the support system I have will get me through this.
So with all that said...Let the journey begin. I know I'm in for a long ride but I know God is holding me in His hands and I'm not afraid to just lay there while I fight for what is really important.
I posted the song below for those who wish to listen otherwise I am praying everyone is well.



Keep Smiling!

New Beginnings...

For those who were wondering in the last few days, No I did not delete all my old posts. I simply removed them so I could put them into scrapbook form as I am starting a rather large new journey in my life. Up until now my life and just seemed to stressful and cluttered. People keep walking all over me and I have had a lot of people in my life that just really don't need to be here. In the last week I have been weening those people out and really trying to focus on my health and life. The next 8 weeks are really going to be the hardest and that is why I feel it is the best time to start a new chapter. I need people in my life who are going to be supportive and I also want people in my life who want me in their life just as much as I want them in mine. If you are willing to be apart of that journey then feel free to stick around but be prepared, this is my blog and my journey so I will be writing about my feelings and although I don't plan on offending anyone, I just want to make it clean that I have the right to feel in the first place. this is a huge part of why I am cutting people out of my life. However for those that are willing to join me, this will also be exciting as I just moved into a place of my own and although my health isn't the greatest, I plan on making it a rather fun adventure in decorating myself and finding the fun things to do around the new place. :0) For right now though, I have to go get working on some of those health issues we talked about. I hope this finds everyone I love, well.
Keep Smiling.

In the New House!

Well I am officially into the new apartment and all of my stuff in unpacked. Yes I know that sounds impossible but I really don't have that much stuff. Actually my family ended up giving me a lot of furniture but in the end it was a great day and with my family's help, it went really quickly. As I was unpacking I had found this wooden plaque (to the left) that Amanda had given me around Christmas and since it fit so well, it was the first thing I hung up. :0)

After all the unpacking, my parents gave me a $50 giant eagle gift card so I decided to go shopping for a few things and then ended up coming home and making Jello. Its red which and blue and its was made in layers but it was the first official thing cooked in the new kitchen. Here is a picture of the master piece as well. lol.

The blue is on the bottom then red jello with white marshmallows. 

The only other exciting thing is that at the moment I do NOT have the Internet at my new place and until I do I wont be able to post until laundry days. lol. But since I don't have any cable or Internet I have been watching old movies and catching up on the crafts that I have been meaning to do. :0) I have finished Dan's Happy Blanket and I am really excited to give it to him and don't want to ruin the surprise of what it is so I am going to share it here and then put it on facebook after he gets it. lol. Ready? .....

There  you have it. Crocheted it myself. :0) Otherwise there isn't really to much to post other than I am trying to get over another rough patch only to have surgery the 10th but I'm doing OK and trying to stay positive. With all that said though, I'm going to my laundry and head back over to the apartment.
Hope Everyone is well.
Keep Smiling!

Online Clean Up

Have you ever just gone onto Google and typed in your name just to see what would come up? I have heard of people doing this and it is said that a person should do this every so often just to make sure you don't have anything random floating about and tonight I decided that I was curious. I never realized all the things I had signed up for like, myspace, twitter, and other random ones that I seriously either never really understood enough to use or I haven't used in years because of facebook and blogger. I can even remember my passwords and logins to most of them and I am hoping I can get them emailed to me because I plan on shutting them down but I was interested in looking over my myspace because I remember when I used to love it so much.
Lets See...my life 2 years ago and beyond according to myspace.....
My top 8 favorite people were; My sister Mariah, and my friends Richard, Erin, Tina, Tony, Tony's Mom, Zach and Shellie. The funny thing is I still am really close to all but one of them and that is only because his girlfriend doesn't let us talk. So I guess much hasn't changed in that area. Honestly not much has changed at all in the last 2 years. I guess I should be thankful that I'm stable? lol. really i think its just that after college i was able to determined who I really am. I do know I am a lot stronger as a person since then but its still strange to see.
Anyways... I do plan on deleting all but facebook and blogger because the rest is just a waste of space and that bothers me that I have so much out there. I already cleaned up my facebook and email last night. I just want to move on and get a fresh start in all areas, so this is part of taking out the trash.

Here's to the future of adventures with great friends and a lot of smiles!

Moving on and Moving up...

Drawn By Kathryn Aggelakos

I don't know if can really see this picture but it is something my little sister designed to go into my new apartment starting August 1st! You read it right! I was approved for the new apartment and that land lord is so nice. He may not know it much yet but he is really helping me to finally start over for myself and get my life in order. A new plan for my health which is starting August 10th, a new apartment and I am going to finally be able to starting working on my Goals/To do List. It is a new start and I'm so excited to me finally getting to do it. I have been praying so hard and Thanking God so much for answered prayers lately. Even the things I was hoping would end differently; I know He has big plans for me and that maybe the people He is taking out of my life is for a better purpose. 

So for the warnings to those who actually read this, I going to try and post as much as I can but it might only be every 2 weeks unless I get the Internet in the new place right away. Although it is not on my high priority list considering I am moving with no furniture. I have created a wish list on walmart.com and plan on working for everything I need one item at a time and i am so excited to be starting new. But until I get settled, that means Internet is at the bottom of the list. I do plan on posting updates on the apartment as the decorating undergoes so keep checking in. :0) Otherwise I will catch up with you all when I can. Love you all and I'm praying for all of you. 

Keep Smiling!

Weekend away and life in general

I'm sorry that I haven't posted in a few weeks but I have been trying to enjoy my good days with my family and friends. Zach and I did get to run away to Somerset County on June 30th and the ride was pretty amazing. One of my best friends (Stacy) and her family were in town and it was the first time in 3 years since they moved away so we rushed down at the first chance to see them. Zach LOVED the scenery and I can say that if we are both feeling up to it again we will be taking other trips down to see other sites around that area. Sadly we didn't get any pictures with Stacy and her kids but we did get pictures of the bridges and the fire work gorilla that was on the side of the road.

The following day was Church in the park in Waterford and I am very glad to say that I made it and so did Shellie and Thomas! Thomas was actually very good through the service but ended up covered in dirt because he was playing with his car the whole time. Everyone loved him though and he loved everyone there as well. Zach is going to be going to church with me this coming Sunday as long as we both feel up to it and I'm so excited because Zach doesn't really go to church. :0) but anyways....After Church in the park we also got to spend the day with the Chorneys and after going out to lunch with them, we went back to the old house and Thomas got my old bed. He is officially a Big Boy now. :0) I'm so proud. 

Other than that, I have just been enjoying time with my family. We are on the search for new places to live which is kind of stressful and my sisters friends are back and staying here as well which is really stressful so I'm trying to just stay out of the way and avoid the headaches that are coming along with it. :0( I really just cant wait to get this move over with though so things will calm down. 

Things with Zach are doing great for those who are wondering. Unless you count the Department of Health being that the facility that he works at, he is doing great and improving more each day. So with that I think I am going to head off to sleep. 

Love you all and hope you are all smiling!